The Unforgiving "Shoulds"

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We all do it...tell ourselves all the things we should be doing.

"I should work out more..." "I should talk with my family more..." "I should go to church more..." "I should be in a different place in life right now..." 

Whatever it may be that you are "shoulding"...it has to stop. I was talking a friend the other day about this very thing. And what she said was..."When you always say I 'should' do this or that, you only end up 'shoulding' all over yourself!" {get it??} But it's the simple truth. 

"Shoulds" are dangerous, because they only lead to disappointment. If you're always telling yourself all the things you "should" be doing, rather than telling yourself what you can be doing...you'll always be let down. 

It's easier to tell yourself what you should be doing, rather than face the reality of what you can/can't, will/won't do. You always have a choice, whether you believe it or not.  And the simple choice is whether you actually chose to do what you say you should be doing. 

Recently, I've been working on my self talk and learning to be kinder to myself. It's all about the internal dialogue that goes on inside my head. Whenever I find myself saying I "should" be doing something, I stop and tell myself, it's not whether I should do it...it's whether I choose to do it.

For example, I've been trying to work out more and I find myself saying "I should go for a run..." "I should go to yoga..." "I should do more abs..." whatever it may be, I stop myself. I tell myself I have one of two options. One, I do work out...or two, I don't work out. And whatever I choose to do I need to accept, because it was my choice. This has really helped me be kinder to myself and learn that every "should" is actually a choice I choose to make or not make. 

Saying you "should" be doing something is just an excuse to not take charge of the decisions in your life. We all have choices that have to be made one way or the other. But we must learn to be kinder to ourselves, because "shoulds" will never be forgiving.

Ask yourself what you've been "shoulding" on a lot lately and try resolve it with a choice that you either will or won't do. You'll thank yourself later!

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