Thursday, May 31, 2012

When Other People Won't Change

Pin It I've mentioned the blog {Tiny Buddha} before...because, well, I love it. But I stumbled upon this one post today that I really appreciated and wanted to share....
We all want to be loved and accepted, just as we are. We want people to honor our interests, value our needs, and respect our choices in life.
So why, then, do we expect other people to sacrifice theirs for us?
Why do we hope people will change their goals, habits, and values to better align with ours when they haven’t given us any indication they’d be happier for doing it?
Sometimes we think we know what’s best for others, but if we’re honest with ourselves, we’ll likely realize we want people to change when we simply don’t feel satisfied being in a relationship with them as they are.
I’m not talking about people who are violent, dangerous to themselves and others, or in any way abusive. No one should ever feel bound to an unhealthy situation by the ideas of unconditional love and acceptance.
I’m talking about the boyfriend who isn’t as open-minded as you. Or the girlfriend who doesn’t value fitness like you. Or the husband who isn’t as social as you. Or the wife who doesn’t take risks like you.
I spent most of my twenties dating people who were completely incompatible with me.
I got involved with stoic men hoping they’d become more sentimental. I pursued self-professed bachelors hoping I’d be the one to make them want to commit. I even dated men who said they never wanted kids, hoping they’d change their minds because I did.
And why? Because those were the men who were there, and it felt safer to be with the wrong men than leave and risk not finding the right one.
Relationships are all about compromise, and there’s no such thing as a perfect match.
But we owe it to ourselves to recognize what’s non-negotiable in relationships so we don’t end up resentfully sacrificing our needs while secretly hoping the people we’re with will make it worth our while.
The people we want to change—there are others out there who’d accept and even value them, just as they are. We can appreciate them for all their unique quirks, interests, and preferences. Or we can set them free and create the possibility of finding better matches.
We deserve to be happy in our relationships. That starts with choosing to be with people we’d never want to change.
I believe this can be true for not only romantic relationships, for any relationship we encounter in life. We all wish someone's habits were more in allignment with our own, but it's up to us to either accept the differences or not. I think it's a struggle, because we all wish people were or weren't a certain way and no matter how much we wish they were, people simply don't change for someone must be up to the individual.

There have been times in my life when I wished and prayed someone would change and no matter how hard and how much I wished and prayed...nothing happend until I changed. I've began to realize nothing will change until I make the change itself.

 It's unfortunate and even sad sometimes when the change you must make is not having someone in your life, but sometimes that's simply what's best.


Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Wisdom Wednesday

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some words of wisdom for all you beautiful people out there

sometimes when i'm just really happy and everything seems so perfect...even if for just a moment...i stop and take a deep breath in and just smile.
i definitely am an idealist...but i'm also a realist. but i believe anything is possible and i may not have it all together right now...but i'm on my way.
this quote couldn't be more true about my life. i don't always go where i intended to be...but i definitely am where i need to be. i've always said this about andrew too. i would have never guessed that in 2006 when i met him that we would be where we are today.
the moment i have begu to forgive someone who has hurt me, i start to feel a sense of peace within myself and realize what has been the point of holding onto this hurt for so long...because all it really does is hurt myself after all. i may not want certain people in my life because of the hurt they've caused me, but i can say that i wish no ill will to anyone. because that's the type of person i am and the person i will always continue to strive to be.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Humor Me Friday

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{Happy Friday!! And it's a three day weekend!!
Here's some laughs to get you through the rest of your day! :)}

praise the lord!!
HAHAHAHA...but seriously.
hilariously terrible


Thursday, May 24, 2012

What is Within MY Control?

Pin It A friend of mine gave me a section of a book they recently read called The Portable Therapist by Susanna McMahon. I loved it so much that I thought I'd share it with you. I believe we all have struggles in life on what we can and can't control...I know I certainly do. But the older I get, the wiser I become on understanding that there are simply some things I cannot control. Here's what Susanna McMahon has to say on this subject matter...
"There are only two things in the entire world that are within your control:

1. The way you choose to feel about yourself.
2. Your behaviors, which are based on your own feelings.

Nothing else is within your control. If we do not have control over something, then we cannot have total responsibility for it. How often do we take responsibility for others or for consequences that were never within our control to begin with? This concept of control is a critical one for developing self-esteem. As long as we foster an illusion of control and feel responsible for things which are out of our control, we cannot live the reality of our lives and we cannot gain a mastery of ourselves.

You can control your choice of how you feel about yourself; you choose whether you love yourself or you choose not to love yourself. Once you have chosen, then your behaviors will follow your feeling. If you choose to love yourself, you will choose to behave lovingly toward yourself. You accept and forgive and act more gently. If you choose not to love yourself, or not to make a choice (which is a choice in itself), then your behaviors will follow your training and you will ignore yourself, criticize and blame, externalize and expect perfection. It is within your control how you treat yourself. Because the world is treating you badly is not an excuse to treat yourself badly. You cannot control how the world treats you. You can control how you treat the world. Not only can you control your behaviors toward yourself but also you can control your behaviors toward others. Remember, behaviors are not feelings. They are the conscious expression of feelings and they are in your control."
This resonates so true for me. I cannot control the world or the people in it...I can only control the way I choose to feel about myself and my own behavior. I have slowly began to love myself and validate my self worth through lots of hard work by attacking my own inner demons.

There will always be obstacles to overcome, horrible people you encounter, and lessons to be learned. That is out of your control. But no one...and I mean no one can take away your self-worth. Only you can allow that to happen. Don't allow someone else to define who you are, because how someone treats you, talks to you, or about you is on them...not you. Take control of what you can in you look at yourself and your own behavior...because there's very few things that are certain in this life.

A little Look Into My Life

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It's wet....a very wet Thursday here. So I plan to cuddle up with Andrew and my girls and watch movies all night. :) Here's some photos of what I've been up to over the past week and a half or so....{which mainly consist of my dogs of course haha}

Andrew and I went to his parents for dinner. I love their picturesque.
My girls and me on one of our daily trips to the park :)
Bella, the new iPad stand. HA
Hands down the sweetest most lovable pups around {no I'm not biased. It's a fact.}
some photos I put up in my office of my loved ones :)
Simply, THE love of my life. The end. :)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

7 Questions Link Up

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Linking up again to {Gentri Lee's 7 Questions!}

Funny photo:

{this is what happens when my friends and I try on bridesmaid dresses for my best friend's wedding this fall haha}

1. What's your favorite style for home decor? (eclectic, modern, shabby chic, etc.)I definitely love modern, but I also like it to be "home-y" and comfortable as well. Here's some photos of looks I love from my {pintrest} board.

2. What is the best trip you have EVER been on?The best trip I've been on so far is the last trip I took to Colorado {last spring}. I already talked about it once {here.}

3. If you could have an exotic pet, what would it be and why?

A monkey for sure! Although I don't think I'd really like the whole throwing of poop and ripping people's faces off...mmmmm...
4. Do you snore? (you can be honest, we're all friends here.)Me...snore? NEVER! HA! No, of course I do sometimes...when I'm sick or sleeping really really hard. But Andrew says it's not bad. He on the other hand {with all of his allergies} is awful. I usually just smack him in the middle of the night and he stops {kidding...kind of.}

5. Your car breaks down on the side of the road, what do you do?Call Andrew or my best friend to come help!

6. What's one item that has been on your wishlist lately?
This goes back to question #1. We still need some furniture/home decor for our condo. Next purchases will be a nice dining table and patio furniture.
7. It's almost Summer (or winter if you live in the Southern Hemisphere), what are you looking forward to most? 
I'm super excited about this summer/fall because my two very best friend's are getting married in September and I'm blessed to be both their Maid of Honors. I can't wait for bridal showers, bachelorette parties, and then of course their big days!!

{{Link up if you want to join in!}}
{{Have a great night!!}}

Wisdom Wednesday

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it is funny, isn't it?
we've all been burned by certain people in our lives that leaves scars for life.
i'm a believer that however painful the truth may be, it's the right thing to do. being lied to is one of the most painful experiences to go through. everyone deserves the truth.
no matter how much changes in our lives, my true friends will always be my forever friends.
be kind people. step outside of yourself and remember that you may have no idea what's going on in someone else's life. just be kind.
enough said.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Five Regrets {Listable Life}

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Today I will be joining {Moments That Define Life's Listable Life} of Five Regrets {serious or funny}.

 {{disclosure: I try really hard to not regret things in life, because ultimately it's pointless to regret things in your past. It did or didn't happen and it is what it is. But I know we as human being will always have things we wish we would or wouldn't have done.}}

1. Not studying abroad in college. I really wish I would have taken the opportunity while I was in college to study abroad. All my friends who did it said it was one of the best experiences of their lives. At the time, I was a lot more dependent on my family and friends and I think I was too scared to take that big independent step and travel somewhere by myself. I also didn't want to leave Andrew that long either. Now looking back, I wish I would have realized it was a once in a lifetime opportunity and wish I didn't take it for granted. Hopefully I'll just be rich someday and be able to travel the world on my own dime {here's to wishing! :)}

2. Taking life too seriously in high school. I've always felt older than my age and have always wanted to be a "grown up". So with that, I took most things very seriously while growing up, instead of just enjoying being a teenager. I still did all the "normal" things teenagers do, but I never felt completely settled. I think no matter what, I would have felt a bit out of place, but I do wish I could have taken things a bit more lightly and just enjoyed being young.
3. Chewing tobacco. Yes. I chewed time...and I'll never do it again. I was around 16 and was with a couple of my guy friends and I happily regrettably tried it. They told me if I started feeling hot and clammy to take it out because I could get sick. Well guess what? I got sick....yes...even threw up. Never ever again!

4. Not double majoring in psychology. I love everything that has to do with the mind. The way human beings behave and why. I definitely regret not double majoring in psychology. I've always wanted to help people and although I love advertising and what I do, I think it could have opened up some other doors in the future for me.

5. Believing I have to be friends with everyone. Growing up I wanted everyone to like me, and if they didn't....I was devastated. I thought I had to please everyone and the pressure of it all was detrimental to my well being. I wish I would have known then what I know now...that in life you can't  please everyone and there will be people you encounter in life that you simply just don't get along with. The key to this though is you still must be kind and considerate, because how you behave is on you and how someone else behaves is on them.  

{Well that's all! Happy Tuesday!}


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{'s been awhile}

I've been incredibly busy/overwhelmed/stressed/excited/anxious lately and haven't been taking enough time to keep up with my blog, which has been unfortunate because it's such a great part of my day! So, I'm back!

Here's what I've been up to...

It was my best friend's birthday on May 12th {she's the hottie brunette featured above!} so we went to the Twins baseball game! Minneapolis recently got a new stadium, so it's such an awesome experience!

As I mentioned in my last post, my parents and I went to visit my brother and his family in Overland Park, Kansas. I'm extremely close with them so when they moved for my brother's job, I was devasted. Luckily, Overland Park is only around a seven hour car ride so it's not that bad. I'm so blessed to have such a great brother, an incredible sister-in-law {who I truly feel as if she's my real sister} and the most unbelievably amazing niece and nephew in the entire world!

{I hope you enjoy the adorable photos of my niece and nephew as much as I do!}

{{Have a great day!}}

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Playing Catch Up

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I know I've been neglecting my creative outlet {aka my blog} but I've been too busy spending time with these faces...

I've been in Overland Park, Kansas with my parents visiting my brother, sister-in-law, and my niece and nephew {pictured above} I'll catch up more once I get home. Until then, please feel free to "oooo" and "awww" over my sweethearts above...they melt my heart!

Friday, May 11, 2012

Week in Review

Pin It Another week has come and gone. I can't believe it's already the second week of May! I'm so grateful the amazing weather we've been having the past few days. I love going outside with the pups and just breathing in the fresh spring air... :)

{{Here's some photos of my week!}}

always finding the oddest places to sit...on her sister haha {don't worry...I was stopped when I took the pic}
I made blueberry muffins one morning {yummy}
happy hour with {almost} all my favorite ladies :)
my beautiful friend lou and I at happy hour :)
my parents came to the cities for the day so we took a walk around lake harriet 
{I hope you have a wonderful weekend!}

Humor Me Friday

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{hey! it's time for some laughs! tgif!}

this made me giggle and say "awwww!" at the same time :)
#firstworldproblems hahaha
if you have a get this haha
that's it.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Wisdom Wednesday

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{{words of wisdom}}

love and creativity are truly perceptions of what people see them to be.
this is something i've worked on my whole life. not allowing others to demean me and make me out to something that i am not. i know who i am and as long as i hold true to that, no one can take away that.
remember what you have right in front of you. it may take effort and work, but you must always be thankful for what you have.

if it's in the past...let it go. there's a reason why they call it "the past." i've worked on letting the past teach me, but not define me. if we constantly are living in the past, what's the point of living?